If you say you walk
In the Lord’s light
But leave behind
The Devil’s night
If you say you know
That God loves you
And that He’s there
Yes, He hears you
But you push Him away
Because of pain
You see no blue skies
Only heavy rain
I say, giving up
Is not an option
Because He’s been there
Through thick and thin
Through highs and lows
Yes, He’s seen you
He knows just what
You’re going through
Because He is God
And He knows all
So walk in faith
And heed His call.
Today, I have officially passed 1000 all-time views here on WordPress, thanks to many who have visited and subscribed.
It’s hard to believe this blog was started back in February, and now it’s June? Crazy how fast time flies. But I am excited that many are loving this site, and moreso the love of God. I pray all will see the truth of the gospel through this blog, and that they will not merely be hearers of the Word, but doers as well!
God bless all!
Sometimes. . .
Life can drag you down.
Hard.
To the point where you can’t seem to even breathe anymore.
Sometimes. . .
You wonder if God is even listening.
If He cares.
If he loves.
Sometimes. . .
Those who doubt walk away.
But in the long run. . .
Without God. . .
Then never feel better.
They lose hope.
They despair.
They wonder what went wrong in their life.
* * *
Pain is not meant to make anyone feel unloved or uncared for.
Pain is meant to bring us closer to the One Who designated that pain for a reason.
And sometimes love means walking through the fire. . .
Even when it hurts.
* * *
quietmomentswithgodblog.wordpress.com/2026/06/25/its-time-to-walk-away/
If anyone is out here reading this, prayers for Eileen Guyadeen and her daughter, Victoria. I discovered this site through Willie Torres Jr’s prayer chain and subscribed to her blog.
I vowed to pray for her daughter and for her in every way I could.
And I do. Still.
But every message she wrote as of recently didn’t seem to reflect any faith in Christ. . .
Just despair.
But I still prayed, because I believe truly that God can make a difference if He wishes.
But the post above that I recently read. . .it just doesn’t fly with me. . .
I can get her feelings. I can definitely get it. I’ve been in the valley myself lots of times.
I lost my brother a long time ago; I almost died twice as a young kid; there are many in my hometown who hate me for I-don’t-know-what. And I get bothered when stuff like that happens. Sometimes I question God. Sometimes I get angry. Sometimes I want to vent my frustration but don’t know how.
But pain, though it is real and profound, is not unexpected, neither is it purposeless.
Did Jesus ever say we would escape pain? No.
Did Jesus ever promise us an easy life filled with sunshine and rainbows? No.
And yet, many people who identify as Christians believe that.
And they get frustrated or upset with God when something bad happens.
Especially if it’s been going on for years.
A rare disease.
Unresolved trauma.
The ghost of one’s past still haunting their present self.
But that doesn’t mean God doesn’t see.
Because He does.
A long time ago, my family was going through something terrible. My father was hospitalized, and everyone was frightened, including me.
But through that long week of waiting, sleeplessness, and the day of surgery, I discovered something very odd that never again have I really felt.
I knew my father would not die.
I don’t know how I knew. But I did.
My mother was worried he would die, and I remember repeatedly telling her he would make it out. I recall saying it with confidence, because I knew. It was as if something or Someone was telling me he would not die.
And I figured it was the Holy Spirit reassuring me, telling me he would make it out alive.
And he did, thank God!
Pain matters because it is what strengthen our faith in our Father (if we believe) and it is what draws those to God (if we don’t believe). The Enemy will trick us into believing pain is meant as punishment, but that is not always the case.
Sometimes pain is meant for something better. We may not know what it is, but we know God has a plan behind all suffering. We just have to wait for His timing and see what it is.
Sometimes pain is meant to draw straying people closer to the One Who endured horrible pain on the cross to win the victory over Hell and redeem us all forever!
(Go to this link to learn more about what the Bible says about pain.)
If anyone is acquainted with Eileen and Victoria, reach out and let them know I care, even if no one else does. (link to her blog: quietmomentswithgodblog.wordpress.com).
Pain may be unbearable. . .
But losing faith is not an option.
God bless, Eileen and Victoria.
In times of pain. . .
You might bend. . .
But if you trust in God. . .
You will never break.
Wait for His timing. . .
And He will reveal His plan.
He is God Almighty. . .
He died for us.
We should be willing to wait for His timing. . .
Because. . .
He knows us better than we know ourselves.
Amen.
-Starmonia
The rain ceased the day after Tilry’s funeral. The sun’s golden rays beamed brilliantly, drying the sodden ground and snapped plants. Cloudy numbly plodded to school, feeling as though she had been punched in the skull. Her classes passed in a blur, and her friends laughed and chatted gaily at recess. They begged Cloudy to come play with them, but she declined. Nothing frisky or genial felt right to her now that Tilry was gone. She wished it would rain again, but no such thing happened the rest of the week.
* * * * *
Days went by, and still Cloudy remained sulky and gloomy. Nothing could lift her spirits. Fun-loving Sniper, who normally could make her laugh by doing something silly, tried to cheer her up, but even her prankster brother could do nothing about her blue mood. Springtime saw the sun melt away behind the clouds of Cloudy’s life and prayed desperately to God that her daughter would once again be joyful. But day after day passed with the same results―Cloudy was sullen and didn’t want to play. She began to do poorly in her classes, and her grades dropped drastically. She barely ate or slept. Springtime continued to cry out, but with no audible reply.
Gradually, March fifteenth arrived. It was now less than a week away from Cloudy’s birthday, but the child no longer felt excited about it. The day that was supposed to be so full of festivity and mirth now swayed overhead her mind like a dark cloud that wouldn’t go away, shrouding her mind in haunting memories of shadow. Even Liloy seemed far away in her thoughts. So did Meta Knight. Often at night whenever he visited, Cloudy would see him by the fence alone, crying. At times like those, she instinctively knew what to say or do, but now she withdrew from him altogether. She knew he was still suffering from the funeral, same as she was, and that likely neither could make the other feel better about the current stances of their minds and souls.
Liloy seemed to skirt her father’s presence as well. Father and daughter were never together much anymore these days. If Liloy was in the house, Meta Knight was outside. They never held hands anymore or hugged. There seemed to be an invisible force pulling them apart, dragging them farther and farther away from each other, unraveling the already-fragile threads that once held their family bond close together. Cloudy found that painful truth incredibly sad.
Even her siblings seemed to notice the silent breach of bonding between the soldier and woman.
“Hey, what’s up with those two?” Sniper asked on the third day when Meta Knight sat on the porch and Liloy on the grass with the children. “Why are they behaving so awkwardly? They’re always apart now. Why is that? They’ve never done that before.”
“I wish I knew, but then again, it’s none of my business, is it?” Cloudy muttered. She trudged away to the opposite side of the house and sat down, her back to the rosebushes. Sniper stared after her, then shrugged and went back to his carefree playing.
* * * * *
Then the unexpected happened.
Four days before Cloudy’s birthday, Meta Knight asked Cloudy if she wanted to accompany him to Liloy’s house, which lay deep in Whispy Woods. Cloudy agreed, and off she walked with him into the forest. She didn’t know what they were doing but she knew from Meta Knight’s dark-green (meaning anxious) eyes that it was something important. She felt a little flutter of unease and discomfort, but she pressed on through the sharp, winding trails and dense undergrowth. The vines twitched in the occasional breezes that swept through the area, and the boughs of the oaks creaked and groaned.
At last, they came to a modest, well-kept red-brick cabin that stood along Miracilius Trail, which lay two miles parallel to Magnolia Brook. Cloudy smiled as she spotted the well-tended rosebushes in front of the railed porch. Roses were the favorite flower of both she and Liloy; magnolias were second. Cloudy’s mind then traveled back to last year’s Thanksgiving, when Scazzarda had showed a rose to the picnickers and explained that the thorns represented the crown of thorns, or the suffering Christ endured on the cross; the rose petals represented Jesus’ blood, or the washing away of our sins; and the green of the stem and leaves represented the renewal of our bodies and spirits in Heaven, or eternal life. Cloudy had never forgotten that beautiful demonstration of what the design of the rose meant to her and what she hoped would one day mean to all.
She was brought out of her reverie by the sound of scuffling and scraping inside the house. The front door opened and out came Liloy, dragging a large gray box onto the porch, a morose look on her pallid countenance. She raised her head and saw her father and his friend standing in the yard, and a peaked smile replaced her sorrowful look. “Hello!” she shouted.
For the first time in days, Cloudy grinned, her eyes brightening with the old spark of her fiery spirit. There was the cheerful, convivial Liloy they had always known and loved. “Hi!” she returned, darting up the porch stairs and almost tripping on the broken top step. Liloy looked alarmed, but Cloudy regained her balance and hopped over to the box, curiously peeking inside at a load of knickknacks and other odds and ends.
“Hello, Father,” Liloy said happily, smiling at him as he mounted the steps and walked up beside Cloudy.
“Greetings, my child,” he answered gravely. He glanced down at the box. “What are you doing, my dear?”
Liloy’s face suddenly became heartsick once more and she looked down for a moment, feeling uncertain about the recent thoughts she had been having. Her eyes rose to the huge oak tree overshadowing her porch, the tree that had protected her cabin from lightning strikes and fierce hurricanes and floods, from blowing snow and wind for so many years. This wasn’t just any cabin, she knew; it was her childhood home, the place where she had grown up after her mother had married Meta Knight. However, the marriage didn’t last. She remembered all too well the terrible day her mother had thrown her wedding rings at Meta Knight, screamed horrid words at him, and stormed out of the cabin. And she never came back.
Never. The word gyrated in her head. Never.
“Liloy?” Cloudy asked, concerned. “Are you okay? You look like you flew off to a different universe for a moment.”
“Oh. . .” Liloy smiled, trying to mask the tumultuous chaos of her mind. “Oh, no, Cloudy. I was just thinking, was all.” She looked back at the front door, her eyes darkening, and then at Meta Knight. “Father, would you mind coming inside a moment? We, er, need to talk. . .in private, preferably.”
One look at her face and Cloudy knew the news was going to be bad. Since she had already had enough bad news in the last couple of weeks, she decided she didn’t want to listen to what Liloy had to say anyway. “I’ll just wait out here,” the little girl offered. “You and your dad just go on in and talk about whatever needs talking about, okay?”
“Uh, yeah. Okay.” Liloy gestured for Meta Knight to walk inside and shut the door behind them. She led the way into the living room, which, to his bewilderment, was now completely barren of furniture. He watched as Liloy planted herself in the middle of the floor, crossed her arms, and shot him that resolved stare which determined she was about to announce something either truly exciting or completely sad.
In this case, it was neither.
“Father, I need to tell you something,”Liloy answered. “I’ve decided I’m going to sell this house and move.”
That hit Meta Knight hard, but he tried not to show it. “And go where?” he gently asked.
“To Mount Moonstem.” Liloy sighed a little. “I understand they have some cabins there you can buy or rent.”
“That’s why you are moving all the boxes out,” Meta Knight observed, his eyes growing wide in disbelief. “But Liloy, why would you just do this without consulting anyone first? Don’t you love it here anymore?”
Liloy sighed again. “It’s my life. I can do as I wish, Father. And I wish to move.” She pressed a hand to her forehead. “Actually, the truth is, Father, when Tilry died, I knew I could no longer be happy without him here. To me, it’s just empty, desolate, barren, as if he were never here at all. It feels too much like the days after Dad died of alcohol complications. After he passed, I wanted to run away. The only reason I stayed then was because you married Mom. When she disappeared, I stayed on because of Tilry. Now he’s gone too.” She was crying now. “I’ll never truly be happy here again, Father. The best thing I can do now is leave.”
Meta Knight sighed and closed his eyes. He knew all too well the feeling of having a father who never truly cared. . . “I will indeed miss you living so close to me, darling. But if this is what you choose, then so be it.” He opened his eyes and managed a slight smile. “At least you will have your baby to keep you company.”
Liloy’s face grew cold and her eyes became stony. Meta Knight had never seen that look on her face before. “Actually,” she began, and then halted, seemingly hesitant to reveal the words right on the tip of her tongue. Meta Knight felt a strange tenseness take ahold of him.
“Actually. . .what?” he prompted.
Liloy looked to the ceiling and back at her father, looking him straight in the eye. “I am going to tell you the complete and honest truth,” she said softly yet sternly. “I told my high school friend, Lilith, that I felt incapable of taking care of my child with Tilry gone and asked her help. She suggested I ‘, as she put it.”
Meta Knight gasped in horror. “Liloy! What are you talking about? Are you saying she suggested you to end your pregnancy?! How could she?! That-That is not an adequate solution! . . .I mean. . .I. . .” His voice faltered, and the words died away in his throat.
“I understand how you feel, Father, and I even argued with her on that issue. But she. . .she seems to. . .” She broke off as she recalled that day and their argument. . .
* * * * *
“Why can’t I just put him up for adoption. . .?”
““Maybe you could. . .but what if no one adopts him? . . . . Or what if you do decide to raise him and he doesn’t have a mattress to sleep on. . .? . . . . What if he has to live on the street, barely eating, barely surviving. . .? . . . . And all because his mother chose the harder route of suffering instead of doing the kinder thing that would allow him to live in peace?”
* * * * *
Liloy shook her head as she finished relating Lilith’s words to her dismayed father. “Lilith was right, Father. I can’t do this. I can’t raise my child by myself. Nor can I put him up for adoption; the awful things she mentioned could happen. I don’t want my child to suffer in any way. Therefore, there’s only one choice I can possibly make.” She took a deep breath.
Meta Knight read her thoughts even before she spoke them. “No,” he whispered, shaking his head. “No. You cannot do such a thing!”
“It’s my life,” she coldly remarked.
“It’s not in your authority to take the life of your own child!” Meta Knight shouted at her, fury in his voice. “How could you even think of doing such a thing! This is not how I raised you!”
“I have no other choice! You know I don’t!” Liloy yelled back, her voice rising shrilly.
“You do have a choice!” Meta Knight returned. “You can choose to take the hard road and raise your child yourself! I have seen single parents guide their children themselves and I admire them highly for that! I did the same for you and Gregory when your mother left me, and I never gave up, even when I truly wanted to!”
“I’m not you!” Liloy cried out, the weight of her words slamming full force on him. “I’m not a soldier! I’m not someone who struggles for peace and answers to their questions! I wasn’t abused like you were!” She paused for breath, her heavy breaths filling the stillness of the room. “I’m not you,” she repeated in a whisper, her voice trembling.
“You cannot do this,” the soldier spoke once again, his voice angry. “You are making a big mistake!”
“Then it’ll be my mistake,” Liloy coldly responded. “But I am only doing the best for my baby.”
“No, you are not!” Meta Knight cried. “You will only hurt him of you follow through with such a thing! If you accomplish this awful deed, you will forever regret it!”
“Maybe, but at least I will have peace knowing I only tried to do what was best for him,” Liloy said calmly. She didn’t seem to care about her mortifying plan.
Meta Knight was aghast. Has she completely lost her mind?! he thought, alarmed. He was panicked. She can’t do this! Not at any cost! This is ridiculous!
“Liloy,” came a quiet, rigid voice from the direction of the doorway. With a gasp, both family members turned and saw Cloudy standing there, her normally dazzling eyes dark as night. Who knew who long she had been standing there, listening to their conversation?
“Oh, dear. . .” Meta Knight nervously swished his cape behind him.
Liloy crossed her arm and put her foot down hard. “What?” she shot back, her voice rough.
“Why would you want to get rid of your baby because you feel you cannot take are of him?” Cloudy asked. “God specifically tells us in the Bible that the murder of babies is wrong. And you yourself know you can raise your child yourself without Tilry’s help. After all, you have God. But Lilith’s evil words have blinded you to the duty God gave you as a mother―to raise, love, protect, and nurture your child.”
“I have made my choice,” Liloy said in a tone of finality. “Nobody can change my mind now.” With those forbidding words, she turned and walked toward the front door.
Cloudy was beginning to get desperate. There was nothing else she could now but try to snap Liloy back to reality. “You can’t!” she shrieked, and leaped forward to grab Liloy’s cape. Her teeth closed around the pink fabric and she jerked her head backward, trying to prevent Liloy from walking out the door.
“Let go of my cape!” Liloy ordered.
Cloudy’s response was to lean her head even farther back and tug harder. She refused to let Liloy take the life of anyone, especially an innocent baby who had done no harm and deserved a chance to live. “You can’t do this to your baby!” she wailed in dismay. “You cannot! I’m telling you, you cannot!”
“Let go of me this instant!” Liloy yelled sharply, raising her hand and knocking her fist over the child’s head. Cloudy, stunned, fell backward, the rose-colored cloth slipping from her mouth. Meta Knight was shocked, but Liloy merely stormed out of the room, preparing to leave. But just as she reached the front door, she heard Cloudy murmur:
“You promised. . .You promised Tilry you would take care. . .of your baby. . .”
Liloy forze at those words, and her mind flashed back to the hospital room. She had been standing beside the bed, waiting for Tilry’s last words to her. A weary hand in hers; it felt ice-cold to the touch. A raspy voice speaking his final words to her:
“Take care. . .of our baby. Promise. . .you will.”
Liloy stood there in a state of semi-shock, dazed, as she suddenly recalled her very last words to Tilry:
“I promise.”
“‘I promise?'” she repeated softly over and over again. Then she violently shook her head, as one waking from a dream. “I. . .did promise. . .didn’t I? But I can’t. . .I can’t do this. There’s no way on earth I can raise my baby. It’s too much for me. It’s too. . .much. . .” With an outburst of anger, she kicked open the front door, sending a shower of dust and wood splinters flying onto the porch. “No!” she muttered to herself, “I can’t do it! I can’t take care of my baby! Not now, when I’m alone! I have no other choice btu to do what I am able!” She stomped off down the steps, slamming the door, leaving behind a bruised, sore puppy and a furious, but helpless, father who stood in the middle of the living room, wondering where he had gone wrong.
The moment the rain started, Reverend Helman ordered everyone out of the flood-prone field, warning all that where they stood was a low-lying area and was susceptible to flash floods. The heavy-hearted mourners scattered, obeying the command. Springtime and her family raced up a steep hill that overlooked Tilry’s grave, and there they halted, breathless.
From her vantage point, Springtime’s eyes roved over the field. Nothing much seemed to have changed about the landscape. The open grave lay in the center of the waving sea of grasses; the trees bordering the field angrily whipped their branches in deadly arcs in the wild gusts of wind; the flowers stood firm and proud despite the rain’s relentless assualt on their delicate stems and fragile leaves. But the atmosphere of the bright, sunny days in the past was no longer the same. It was darker, intangibly heavier. . .harder to bear, somehow.
“Where did Cloudy go?” Scazzarda yelled to Springtime over the roar of the rain.
“She went off with Liloy to find Sir Meta Knight, I think,” Springtime shouted back. “I’m sure they’ll arrive soon.” I pray, she added mentally.
Scazzarda shielded her eyes from the blinding rain droplets and peered across the field to the woods. She stood there a few minutes, waiting for her son, his friend, and his daughter to reappear from among the trees. The women, their veils and shawls flap-flapping in the wind like ghostly banners, and the men, their faces set, waited behind her. No one uttered a sound.
At length, three figures emerged from the dark woods and walked toward the group clustered on the hillside. They were Meta Knight, Cloudy, and Liloy. All three were soaked and their appearances were bedraggled, but they appeared to be okay.
Scazzarda waited until the three crossed the field, climbed up the hill, and joined the group. Then she reached out and took her son into her arms, embracing him tightly. “Magnus, I was so worried about you!” she said softly. “You ran off and I didn’t know what had happened to you! I’m glad little Cloudy and your daughter went after you and made sure you were okay.” She drew back a little and looked deep into his eyes. “Are you all right?”
He didn’t answer for the longest time; instead, he looked over at Cloudy and Liloy, who gazed back at him, their eyes shadowed, their faces dark. At last, he turned back to his mother and quietly said, “I am all right, Mother. I appreciate your concern.”
Scazzarda heaved a sigh of relief. “Oh, good. I’m glad you’re okay, Magnus, I would hate for anything to happen to you.” His eyes flashed gray, but she didn’t notice, thankfully. It’s better to keep her in the dark about the whole thing. . .or is it? Cloudy wondered.
Reverend Helman came up to the group and looked out over the field, which was already beginning to flood. The mucky, muddy water formed puddles in the beaten, pressed corners of the field; the mud made a sucking sound when anyone stepped in it and tried to pull his foot back out. “Thank God we got out of there when we did,” he spoke gravely. “We managed to fill in the grave, but if it floods any more the casket’s liable to be lifted out of the grave and possibly tossed somewhere.”
Cloudy shuddered at the thought of waking up and opening her front door to a casket lying on the porch. Goosebumps prickled along her skin; shivers crawled down her spine. The rain continued to pour down on her, making her feel even more cold, wet, and miserable than she already was. The sun was nowhere to be seen; only thick, grayish-black clouds covered the sky.
“Come on, dear,” Springtime said quietly, steering her away from the congregation of mourners. “Let’s go home.”
Cloudy turned, about to walk away with her family, then paused and looked back one last time at the headstone on which was crudely carved the name “Tilry Stellarum.” She couldn’t believe he was dead, lying in the dirt, and would soon become part of the dust. She glumly recalled the Bible verse of Genesis 3:19, “. . .for dust you are and to dust you will return.” It was a truth undeniable, she knew, but this was the first time she had ever witnessed a process that would soon lead to the outcome of that verse. She turned her face away from the grave and fell into step with her mother, heading down the hill, taking great care to avoid large puddles.
* * * * *
Meanwhile, Liloy and her friend from high school, Lilith Manshion, were walking down the hill and back to Liloy’s house. Lilith was expressing her sorrow for Liloy’s husband’s passing. “He was a great person,” she said. “It’s too bad he had to die. He would have loved to see his child.”
Liloy sighed and looked up to the roiling sky. Now was the time to reveal her innermost thoughts. “Lilith, I’ve been thinking about something very important, and I need your opinion on this. You’re a great friend of mine, and I know you’ll have some ideas.”
“Sure, I’ll help,” Lilith answered, pausing and gazing intently at her friend. “What do you want to talk about?”
Liloy inhaled and then slowly let her breath out, choosing her words carefully. “What am I going to do about my baby?” she wondered. “Now that Tilry’s gone, there’s no way I can raise him on my own. I’m not even eighteen yet!” She wiped a tear from her eye. “Tilry was the only reason I hung on for as long as I did, but since he died, my rope has been down to a thread.”
Lilth placed her hand on Liloy’s. “Dear, I know how you feel in this situation, and I believe I can provide an answer to your dilemma. It may not be easy, but sometimes the hardest choice is the right one.”
“Really?” Liloy perked up. “What is it?”
Lilith looked over at a dead oak tree rotting away in the misty rain, which was tapering off. “Let go of what you love,” she said. Then seeing Liloy’s puzzled expression, hastened to add, “To put it simply yet nicely, opting for a different path.”
Liloy halted right in her tracks and stared wide-eyed at her friend. “Are you saying to end my pregnancy?!” she exclaimed. “Lilith, how could you advise such a thing!”
“I was only making a suggestion,” Lilith said condescendingly. “Of course, you don’t have to do it, you know. You could just raise him yourself.”
“W-Why can’t I just put him up for adoption or something?” Liloy heatedly demanded.
“Maybe you could,” Lilith replied, “but what if no one adopts him? What if he remains in the orphanage or foster care section for the rest of his life, being worked hard and ordered about day after day? Or what if you do decide to raise him and he doesn’t have a mattress to sleep on, can’t get a proper education, or when he’s older, a well-paying job? What if he has to live on the street, barely eating, barely surviving, because of the lack of money? And all because his mother chose the harder route of suffering instead of doing the kinder thing that would allow him to live in peace?”
“I —” Liloy wanted to speak, to tell Lilith she disagreed with her friend’s interpretation of sacred life, but the words seemed stuck in her throat. Somehow, she had the weirdest feeling that perhaps Lilith was right. Maybe her baby never would get adopted. Maybe they would have to live on the street because she couldn’t adequately provide for him. Maybe getting the load of a new child off her mind and body would ease the tension and the ache of being left behind. But a voice in her heart whispered to her that doing such a thing would not bring relief, only regret.
“What were you going to say?” Lilith looked sidewise at Liloy, her blueish-purple eyes curious.
“I—I—” Liloy suddenly didn’t have the heart to tell Lilith her true thoughts. “I was just going to say that—I will. . .definitely. . .think about what you said.”
“You’d do well to,” Lilith answered, beginning to walk again. “I am your friend, and I am only trying to help.”
“I know,” Liloy answered under her breath in a mournful tone, trailing behind her friend.
* * * * *
That evening, Springtime’s family was sitting around the kitchen table, eating dinner. The rain hammered mercilessly outside, its pitter-pattering making a tinkling noise on the roof. Springtime was only about a fourth through her food when she noticed Cloudy was not in her usual spot. Springtime cast a helpless glance at her husband and saw the troubled look in his eyes, the creased expression of worry on his face. The funeral had no doubt really taken a toll on Cloudy. And I don’t think the fact that I tried to practically shove her over to look at Tilry in his casket helped much either, she thought regretfully. I’m sorry, Cloudy. If I had only know how much this would have affected you, I would never have brought you to the ceremony.
“What’s taking Cloudy so long?” Sniper inquired, sinking his teeth into his third wiener. “She’s missing all this good food!”
“I’ll go see to her,” Springtime offered, rising from the table.
But just as she left the kitchen and crossed the parlor, a rap came on the door. She went to open it, and was deftly surprised to see Meta Knight with his daughter and mother. All three were drenches in mud and rain and looked tired.
“I’m sorry if we intruded into your nightly routine,” Scazzarda apologized, “but I am leaving on a short drive to my sister’s house in Blackville and I don’t want Magnus to be left alone in the cabin. Liloy shouldn’t be alone either, so I brought them here. Hope you don’t mind.”
“O-Of course I d-don’t,” Springtime stammered, trying to get over her amazement at three Stellarum members randomly showing up on her front doorstep at eight o’clock at night. Still, she figured, Scazzarda must be pretty desperate to get these two with company if she walks all the way over here this late. “We’ll find a place for them to sleep tonight.”
“Thanks,” Scazzarda whispered gratefully. Then she disappeared into the slushy, inky blackness of rain.
Springtime escorted father and daughter inside and shut the door. The two stood on the welcome mat, dripping rain onto the floor and creating rivulets of water. “Oh, my,” Springtime chuckled. “How rude of me to stand around nice and dry while you two are probably cold and wet. I’ll quickly run upstairs and grab some towels, and then I’ll make two extra plates of food. After all, in this house, all are welcome!”
“Except for creeps!” Sniper yelled through the partway-open kitchen door.
“Yeah. . .except for creeps.” Springtime then rushed off to do the deeds she had promised Meta Knight and Liloy.
* * * * *
Springtime pushed open Cloudy’s bedroom door and discovered her child sitting on the bed, the snowy lace canopy curtain creating a mystical appearance around her. Cloudy stared broodingly at the wall, her eyes devoid of any happiness. The joy she felt when she had first heard about Tilry’s possible recovery had been tarnished when he had fallen ill again and completely disintegrated when he had died. Springtime looked out at the rain and saw the sheets descending hard by the hazy ring of the lamppost’s light. Then she came over to he daughter and sat beside her. “Meta Knight’s here with Liloy,” she said, trying to sound cheerful. “Maybe you’d like to see them?”
Cloudy didn’t answer. When she finally spoke, it wasn’t the answer Springtime had expected. “As long as they’re actually here,” she said in a tone which indicated something other than doubt in her mother. Instead, it indicated a shadow that grasped joy and vanished, leaving behind only the wind of bewilderment, tears, and anger. Death was the name of that shadow.
Springtime was taken aback a moment, but said, “Darling, this funeral has really messed with your mind, hasn’t it?”
“It shouldn’t have happened,” the puppy replied, standing and walking to the window.
“You’re right,” Springtime said. “It should not have happened. But because Adam and Eve ate of the forbidden fruit in the garden of Eden, now sin has cursed the world. Everyone sins. And God says that the punishment for sin is death.”
Cloudy heard, but the words didn’t penetrate her heart. She murmured to herself, “It shouldn’t have happened.” And again she repeated those painfully truthful words, “It shouldn’t have, and yet. . .I knew it would.”
Springtime started, alarmed suddenly. “What do you mean, you knew it would happen?”
Cloudy frowned, puckering her brow as she tried to think of how explain her vison of a few days before. “I had a dream,” she said slowly, “and in my dream, I was on a platform that kept turning in all directions. And everywhere I turned, I saw Tilry lying in a casket. When I woke up, I began to wonder if that was another vision I had, since Jacob once told me I had a rare gift for glimpsing the future on rare occasions.”
“Why didn’t you tell us this from the start?” Springtime said.
“I don’t know,” Cloudy said, hanging her head as if she had done something wrong. “I guess I just didn’t.”
There was a quietness so still Springtime almost wished she could hear a pin drop or a crash of thunder. But none of those two things occurred; the room remained silent. And in the strangest way, Springtime though, chills running down her spine, that almost reminds of Tilry. He who once spoke will now forever be silent. . .we’ll never hear your voice again, Tilry, this side of heaven.
* * * * *
“So your vision served as a forewarning to Tilry’s death,” Meta Knight spoke in a slow, hynotic monotone, staring upward at the rain falling violently and tilting the grass stalks.
“Yeah,” Cloudy said in a hushed voice. “I guess it was. But I suppose at the time, I just didn’t know it.”
The two friends were sitting on the porch, watching the rain and discussing the events of the past week.
Meta Knight released a pained sigh. “I never dreamed such a tragedy would befall my family so soon. And Liloy. . .she so wanted him to see her baby. But now he’s gone. And he’ll never come back. He—” He buried his face in his hands and began to cry, deep sobs wracking his frame. “Why—Why did it have to happen?”
“I don’t know,” Cloudy answered, feeling misery swell up deep within her, threatening to drown her. “I don’t know why it happened, Meta Knight. But it shouldn’t have. It never should have.” She took a deep breath as she lifted her face to the sky and took a few timid steps closer to the porch railing. The rain blew against her face, stinging her nose and forehead. She didn’t flinch in the slightest, though. And suddenly, the rain, the gray clouds, the darkness—it all seemed to remind her of something that once she had taken for granted but now she knew she would no longer. “We can never go back,” she whispered, her voice sounding louder against the roaring rain. “We can only go forward. Forward is the only way left to us now. The past is past; the future is before us. That’s the only way we can go. On and on we must push.”
The words danced in her head. On and on. . .On and on. . .On and on. . . The beat pounded in her head, making her feel woozy and disoriented. She felt as if she were spinning out of space and time. Meta Knight didn’t move; his face remained concealed in his hands; his figure shook with sobs.
Cloudy put out a paw and let the rain cascade over it, wishing she could wash away the memories and scars of this horrible day from her mind. More than that, she wished she could go back in time and change history. She wished she could change the outcome of what was. But it didn’t work that way, though, and she knew it. They could never go back; forward was the only path worth choosing this side of heaven.
(Verse 1)
You’re ready to give up
Think you’ll never live up
To the standards you’ve set for yourself.
Don’t try to be someone
Who ignores the voice of reason
And can’t handle problems themselves.
(Pre-Chorus)
Come to the One
Who gave His Son
To ransom you.
(Chorus)
Time is short
Work is much
Dedicate your life
To such and such
That is what
This life is for
‘Cause God is our
Mediator
Mediator.
(Verse 2)
You cry alone at night
Wanting to set things right
But maybe all is just too broken.
But hear me when I say
Nothing is too far away
For God to mend with a word spoken.
(Pre-Chorus)
Come to the One
Who gave His Son
To ransom you.
(Repeat Chorus 2x)
(Bridge)
So come, oh, come, come to God
Come and bow before Him.
So come, oh, come, come to God
Come and bow before Him.
(Repeat Chorus)
P.S. Let me know your thoughts on this song!
~ ~ ~
Backing piano track:
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